Hah, read the last post and laugh. I may be willing to accept another, again Into my life, But, who might be willing to share Theirs with me? The field of possibilities Is quite empty, And unlikely to change. I am left realizing I could, again, be content with my own company. A wiser path.
This other stops for lunch before heading on. I enjoy his company, if not quite the feelings Rising in me. The friend who left this morning led me To believe he might be open to such. He is not, Made clear, not that way. I am left realizing I could, again, be open to such, Again, accept love, Again, welcome sharing life with another. Space in my heart for more, even while never Not missing you.
After a wonderful month here, one friend Prepares to leave, heading for new adventures Of her own. Another visits, a routine trip that coincides with this goodbye. Together we all walk the shore as the sun sets.
Drive home, I am over used to long drives but This one I am not looking for others to fill spaces. I am looking Only for my own space, for quiet and thoughts, For music. Leaving this land in warming morning light It looks sweet.
Left early to drive to Ithaca. New roads. Coming in not impressed with the countryside Glad to arrive Dinner with family for this wedding. Enjoyed Of course and of course see the huge differences Choices give life. I am glad to be here with my family, However too short the time which underscores how Alone I am.
The shop has slowed. Live and learn. Part of the fracas was over rehanging. Intentions were good Expressed but not clearly. After ponies comes Landscapes. A chance for the partner to shine Maybe. Maybe not. Next year do this change sooner. I see that She felt pressured. Is it important to consider? Yes and no. In the larger scheme of life, no. In learning the small particulars here, yes. My fault, naturally, Not communicating that.
A friend staying with me modeled today Here in my yard and was divine. A joy to paint. For the first time new painting friends came, The painting intense, fun! The day was glorious, The company splendid. An amazing respite in what is otherwise Not so easy a life to live. It's true, life's better With good companions.
The Studio at Line's End Farm is where I paint and try to find some joy again, and some equilibrium, not simple these days. One weblog records thoughts, ideas, methods and mixtures, palettes, observations, actually anything that intrigues me concerning my painting and working in the studio. Another observes only the horse in paintings that I find influential. The last are done for my sanity. All are my opinion only, open to other suggestions.
I will write in red, for my dear, love; who never saw red, not in ink, not in ire.
In 2010, the cold went beyond ten decades, was a century mark of hard winter through the mid-atlantic. For one small household banked by an Eastern Shore river this winter was epochal.
