Friday, November 25, 2011


Rode the little yellow horse with friends.
Every time I swing a leg over a saddle
I remember you.

Sun has set over the river marshes leaving
The soft winter colors to slowly fade and
I remember you.

Quiet enough to hear distant neighbors, tractors,
Sibilant murmurations as small flocks wing over, all remind
Me of you.

Thursday, November 24, 2011


Walked the weedy paths this cool morning,
Hearing trees creak and on high a red hawk calls:

On the inward turns, wish for reminders that friends, far or near
Care. The dogs romp through glowing plumed grasses and
A reminder comes.

On the outward turns, hope to meet the day with grace, with
Contentment. The sun-washed air so clear, is soft, sweet and I
Can look forward.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011


Revisiting holidays, need change, not to ignore but to reflect
How time moves. We all have dates, holidays that have meant much.
(Opening Day, Fenway)

Now left with a desire to reinvent, reinstate, remodel these dear dates,
Reminded not even He (or She) did it all in a day, for sure, nor will I,
Oh thank-god!

Tuesday, November 22, 2011


Allow the laughter, the corollary to the tears,
Allow friends well met to give comfort and allow
This takes time

Monday, November 21, 2011


Part of this journey is learning to breathe past the being scared
And taking hold, however much we would rather just let it all
Go pass us.


Perhaps I thought would I would be firmly decided
On the next course of my life, whatever that
Is to be.

Thought I'd have not only a better idea of what it was
But a mapped out strategy to stride confidently along,
Good with myself.

Instead, here I am, while able to consider past "dinner"
Still feeling so overwhelmed by all that is out there and of
Going it alone.


Conflicting thoughts of what I want,or think I want;
Do I even know what I am thinking? And then fear
Starts niggling in.

What am I doing with this life left? This is rhetorical,
We all ask similar, always have. It is doing it alone
That is scary.

Where did I think I'd be, not yet there. True north was
The two of us, my compass is wonky, even if it no longer stays
"South" as long.

Saturday, November 19, 2011


Several weeks of traveling to paint under a master
Several weeks of spending time in the city
With my go-gos.

Guests of a friend and her dog, we all learn new skills.
For me, new competence painting, tired from travel but
Glad for friends.

Friday, November 18, 2011


An idea that started in that other dearest life
Is coming to fruition in this one. Who'da thunk?
A simple gift.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011


It is a silly thing to enjoy this labyrinth mowed out
Of a weedy field with its myriad waving grasses!
Go-go's walk along,

As I watch fishing boats move on the river, hear the
Neighbor's sheep beyond the trees and feel the field
Has now purpose.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011


Woke this morning to early morning mists and took
The go-go's for a walk through the dewy paths
Along the woodline.

The horses stood catching the first rays of sun
As it broke through the fog, steam rising eerily
Off their backs.

Parts of the bean crop are down, looking like
Paths made for giants, the whole long, dawn
Field looking magical.

Monday, November 14, 2011


A two-folly day. First was walking the simple mowed track,
Made me feel empowered, this silly little thing is mine
And is fun.

Then, a symbol of affection left at my door, unwanted,
Seen as a threat to my equilibrium, however ridiculous
That may be.

Only beginning to claim being on my own, to do, be with
Only what and with whom I choose, not looking far on, it is
Only me now.

Sunday, November 13, 2011


With more time on my hands then sense,
Did something have wanted for three houses back,
Mowed a labyrinth.

A wild grasses simple seven-turn labyrinth wide for two
(Or not) to walk along tall weedy borders, next year, perhaps
Flowers and herbs.

Saturday, November 12, 2011


After a weekend in the city, our dogs revel
In the joy of free movement romping, rolling
Through tall grasses.

Friday, November 11, 2011


Cry quietly, or screaming, cry to the skies and beyond. Then
Scrub eyes, screw up courage to face the world, saying: I'm fine,
Thank-you very much.

Thursday, November 10, 2011


It is up to each of us to keep the web of friend, family, support
Going. And realize the time has come, I need call more or very few
Will call me.

It does take time, and I am under the weather, and effort to keep
One's self in others' lives. Not "good" living, just me trying to figure
Out living now.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011


A murmuration, have seen them often over these marshes.
Jack saw one only once, wonder on his face, that morning in January
Almost two years ago.

A mumuration, so aptly like the soft sound of blackbirds
Whirling in exquisite waves that cloud the skies in twittering
Veils of prayer.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011


Morning a long-legged fox trotted up the drive, loped
By the door and off along the pasture fence heading
To the woodline.

Evening came and I rode with a friend
Along the farm roads and pass the combines
Under a child's moon.

How slow to realize happy as we were to be alone together;
How miserable now I could be alone
Holding the pain.

Monday, November 7, 2011


Not sure where I expected to be this far out, certainly
Not with these feelings of quiet, dragging sadness, but
I'm all right.

Or right enough for facing what life is now. Hmmm,
To those who have said think of the adventure, of all
The new chances,

Well, yes, there is that aspect, but also that change
Is not always wondrous or good, that the pain may
Diminish, not disappear.

Sunday, November 6, 2011


As the sun set, hacked home on the good old white horse, thinking
Of good company, good food and saw a bushy bright red fox racing over
The sheep fields.

Saturday, November 5, 2011


In five minutes more the sun will set at 5:59
And tonight it is windy and cool, clear air across
The mile marshes.

Returned from the city and a fine session painting,
Back with our dogs and a cold for company, first
In three years...

Or more, but the first without having someone who
Loves me, cared and was near. I exxagerate, it is
Only a cold.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011


I worship the sun, not for a tan but
For the evening ritual that is my last, lasting
Tie with you.

In the cooling, it has been two falls since we
Enjoyed this season. I do not "kept" as well
As did you.

Much as I do not as well as you, as I did with you,
I keep slogging on, looking for equilibrium, looking for
A good life.