12/31

Have walked the beaches of my childhood on

This last day of what has been all told, just

Another without you.

Gray Clouds and mists shroud the bay,

White swans glide now, as never did years ago,

Graceful, fluid moments

That reflect well the sadness held that arcs

Through thoughts and soul, softly swirling and

Cupping my heart.

12/30

A day spent with two good friends in a town

I knew in youth when all was ahead and I did

Enjoy the day.

12/29

Read today of a character who mused that

"Making love" was possible only for those

In "new ventures",

Of not seeing how such could ever be possible

Between couples long together .... gawd is she

Ever so wrong.

12/28

Overheard some one calling their pet and hearing

That name, unselfconsciously spoken, hear also the

Connection of family.

12/27

Met with an old colleague, old friend.

He has a presence that has mellowed well

Good to see.

12/26

Spent the day drawing, talking, seeing

A movie, just hanging around, nothing grand,

But still good.

12/25

On this morning the sun rises

Above mists lifting off the bay

In sublime beauty.

12/24

So often I have watched others

Effortlessly maneuver through my kitchen.

Just doing neatly.

As, on this day, neatly did I, helping a cousin.

And he allowed, gave sympathy on being alone, my

Gift from him.

12/23

Driving some more today and shopping,

Where ever my mother wishes to go.

Fine by me.

12/22

A quick trip to see your sister,

To see she is in good spirits, just

To see her.

12/21

It is warm here for December as I walk these roads.

This beach I knew as a child. Walk alone now with

Just our dogs.

12/20

Another day traveling, an easy enough day

Considering all, little traffic, a quiet drive

With my dogs.

Time to pay attention to the road, considering

all moving near...considering each moment is

What I do.

12/18

Sunset 4:45 - two years ago we thought

Caught quick, the start of your recovery, our

Life to resume.

Sunset 4:45 - a year ago memory starts

Thoughts traveling this awful route that

Ended me alone.

A day spent in company of friends, and

Alone with tears, did sit this evening to watch

sun set - 4:45.

12/17

An evening with friends met in a quaint town for

dinner and listening to a band that I only knew

you did like

12/13

To have loved and to have been so loved. So, for what is

Lost, tears taste bitter. For waht was love, tastes sweet and

Sweet salts memory.

12/11

for a friend:

There once was a writer who knew

What placing precisely comas could do,

However blue she might feel

Could write of happiness so real,

Readers would think just how she wanted them to.

12/10

This season I miss you no less, more in fact

This evening in that leather chair I sit,

Cat on lap,

Candles lit everywhere giving a soft light to this

Time I only wish to contemplate in the flames

That gentles edges.

Our dogs sleep near, in this company, in this light

Do the tendrils of hope stir. I hold your heart now

Cupped in mine.

12/6

Fun for living, tears for life, ah how we channel, well, love.

Grief, yes, sorrow, hurt and hardship but also love. Do not

Tears channel love?

So tears for those saddened can be a release needed, except,

Who wants to see another sad? But, we are and we do, well,

Things like cry.

But, hey, mostly cry alone, in our cars, drive, music, cry. We hurt,

We miss and long for, and we cry. And if I am not shedding a tear,

Well, who is?

12/3

Doing what I can as I can, recognizing small gifts

With small gasps of thanks. Small may be all I have,

Small step, breathe.

It is a start days when a breath feels an eternity,

A step breaches canyons and the caring of others?

Bittersweet when compared.

But what a sweet small kindness is the caring of others.

And how important are not small kindness given to each of

Us, small beings?

12/1

Eight minutes until sunset

It rests in the far line of treetops

Ready to drop.

Cried much of the three hours driving back,

Here, home for a time, not knowing how little

Time you had.

Gone now, the light left a soft grayed

Blue-white of old oriental porcelain, color

Of time passed.