6/30

On an open deck overlooking a first beach

Sitting with two old friends, waiting a third,

Waiting the past.

A past bringing forth good memories,

Familiar faces grown beautiful with time

Sketched with wisdom

6/29

This day I wake quiet and rested, ready.

Ready to relax and be with my mom,

Ready for comfort.

6/28

The dogwoods are gone down south, you know.

It is good to see one blossoming here near you,

No longer near.

Here, standing here, kneeling here, weeding here,

Your spot needing more grass, I can not fathom you

Are not here.

6/27

The air is sweet in this home

The spaces comfortable and open

The owners, too.

6/26

On wide sweet waters I float on a queenly barge

Past loons larger than we knew and air replete

With soft sounds.

Past piny islands and quiet sanctuaries

Hallowed by wine, food, friends and the care

Of dear friends.

6/25

Morning mists lift over the valley river

Driving through that one light town you left

So long ago

The early light did not show the place well,

Perhaps you saw more to stay, it passed by

Me in moments.

6/24

Hardest is learning again about joy.

To you I came finally to rest, now must

Rest with myself.

To bring some joy back to myself, my life

I listen for the joy I hear these others speak of

Painting with a passion.

By the moment, by the brushstroke, by the color

Laid next to each other, nestled well, complimenting

Each others' wonder.

6/23

It is the start, a beginning, couched in the familiar.

Roomed large in uncertainty, far from comfort,

Not the painting.

Beautiful places to paint, beautiful places to stay,

Learning new is pulling hard, no stretch yet, best

Is good company.

6/22

I have driven these highways with tears

Today a friend keeps words exchanging in sweeping

Swirls of ideas.

6/21

There are certain skills that need relearning.

First in line is how to face the day, living

A life alone.

What a piece of work I am afraid to pick up,

Look forward, but worse is the static present

Without you here.

So, I am off in this season of movement,

Running off, moving to a place where

Perspective is possible.

6/20

Once again step off, take off, enter again terrain uncertain.

I would say out of my comfort zone but then, these days are all

Out of comfort.

6/19

A day filled with people, friends and food

laughing and riding and keeping company

A good day.

6/18

Beyond a day of small satisfactions capped by anticipation,

I await the arrival of friends and their little dingo dog.

A small time normal.

6/17

One week ago it the wee hours past sweet talk and smooth wine

A fox barked his raspy cough sending we two friends scurrying

To tally-ho.

Three times from the darks of two until the first threads of light

We harkened to the cry, excited and bright to hear, hoping to view

This curiosity.

A fox all night returning to just that one window, we thought

Perhaps a bit quirky, more so after another asserted of course,

It was you.

6/16

Soft rains patter the dust down, rustle soybeans by the woods

I wait where once you waited, watching gray skies, listening

To deer snort.

6/15

Carefully tried, keep tears away, don't mix water with oil.

But cried into colors, they fell and I fell tied not to the painting

Tied to memories.

Sorrow waylays my soul, flooding forth, leaving

My hopes, my nascent balance, shattered again,

Washed by weeping.

Weary beyond sleep, yet rise again from this toil

Waiting to see the deluge pass, lifting my spirit

Beyond desolation again.

6/14

How will I learn to live within these looming spaces.

My eyes run with tears, my mind with fears, seeking

Support for these cares

6/13

Once in a time not so far past

I did treasure a day alone to do as I pleased.

Not any longer.

6/12

"Never attribute to malice that

Which can be adequately explained by stupidity".

Hanlon's Razor

6/11

Bittersweet, heart given, so much of this time-sweetened week

that fortune good and needed allowed a dearest interlude for

friends to meld.

6/10

Skills we honed this weekend are for life.

Skills to enhance and improve our labors,

Our souls more.

6/9

"Where you used to be there is a hole in the world, which I find myself

constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night

I miss you like hell"

6/8

Time lays an undulating swath of concerns,

Which by itself can not fix things, only can give, maybe,

A surface to heal.

6/7

Under extraordinary, soft skies we move sweetly

Attentive to each others damaged corners

Leaving healing kisses.

6/6

A handful of months have stolen by,

A clutch of days, of weeks stretching beyond belief.

No substitute for tears.

6/5

"Life is what happens to us

while making other plans."

"Confronted with loss

We can weave the strands of our past into

A new meaningful future we would never have

Planned to live.

Doing so is a conscious choice".

Vic, ottawa

6/4

I am a traveler on this strange path,

Not conducive to letting foot or soul

Move easily.

So over stumbling blocks strewn wherever,

I needfully place feet wondering how to turn sharp rocks

Into stepping stones

6/3

What gives a sense of shelter?

Strong walls, a warm fire, plenty to sustain, better

Your arms wrapped round.

6/2

Some mornings I wake and wonder

Where went the girl you fell in love with, now,

Who am I?

Some afternoons I spend restlessly moving,

Loosing myself, looking for some clue, now,

Who I am.

Some evenings I wait for night to fall late,

Forgetting the me you fell for years ago,now,

I am who?

6/1

This was a wonderful place when it was our home.

Now I, who am not sure of much, am not much sure,

It is home.