10/14

More cooking, more time spent talking,
Walking, painting. How wonderful having
The ocean near.

10/13

Paint during the day on the second deck
Cook and chat and then walk the shoreline
Into the evening.

10/12

Clouds lift en-masse into the blue sky, 
Hazed in subtle colors as they move
Towards the horizon.

Below the seas march on the shore leaving
Criss-crossed backwash reflecting the sky
Which I paint.

10/11

With a friend spend the morning through afternoon
Not doing much, sightseeing,  stocking for the place,
A lazy day,

The ocean here is larger, prancing along the coast,
Keeping step as we walk the strand, barefoot,
And wind whipped.

Later a storm lashed by the gales and carrying
Thunder and rain and my dog is left shaking
In my arms.

10/10

I hold horses for the blacksmith as ever I did
Listening to his tales and gossips as ever
Did any blacksmith

I have known. And then I leave for another 
shore, driving as the day deepened
Into complete darkness,

Wending my way south to this other place
Where the sea slaps the shore in continuous
Told you so's.

10/9

Readying to travel again; between that prep
Do barn work, hard work that early-on left
Me in tears.

To no longer be doing it for our life together,
Hurt so hard. Today I know hurt still, yet, I know 
Also, simply the

Doing because it needs doing. So, although I miss 
So much the doing for us, there is also now the 
Doing for here.

10/8

Today’s task was simply. or not so simply,
To groom our dogs into some semblance 
Of acceptable appearance.

This may not sound like much but
These last few weeks, they have been 
Left to wallow.

Happily, but lately not presentable. Now? 
They are washed and brushed and still look
Like hyper-active kids.

10/7

I wrangle with this question, what do with
Just me alone. How to embrace single
Without being lonely. 

How my thoughts do sabotage my days,
Feeling these lone hours just fall short of those 
Spent with others,  

As however poor that time may be, it must be better. 
I can’t agree. But also can not yet fully accept so much 
Alone is fine. 

Perhaps because  I have yet to find a way 
To be single and to also share in a way that eases 
My soul well.

10/6

Spend the day cleaning the studio
It is so empty, with little on the walls
I am left

With my thoughts eddying in my skull.
These past weeks, this show has
Kept me occupied

Well, indeed. Now I wonder, again, what
Am I here to do now that I do not have you,
Just me alone?

10/5

I watch evening deepen from your bench
With dogs nearby, no deer seen
I am tired.

But a different tired. I am sorry 
my emotions got me this week but 
I miss you. 

This weekend did not go quite as I hoped. 
But really did fine in that so many 
responded to it. 

Your soul would be happy
With all that happened. 
I miss you, 

But am content to sit out here as the light
Diminishes, an owl hoots, here, home
Easing my soul. 

10/4

Friends came and took me to lunch
Others came through while I worked
More paintings sold. 

And it is a beautiful show, exactly 
As I envisioned it to be, the day just
Doesn't have you.

10/4

I will fill in the missing days, which had hope
Meanwhile 27 years ago we married this day
I fail again

10/3

A long day, enough people at the opening
But not enough who willing to buy.
I miss you

Not being here to help and buoy me up. 
To remind me of all the old friends who did come. 
To hug me,

I am disappointed that more paintings
Did not sell, however much people expressed delight, I 
Did want sales

10/2

A longer day than I wanted it to be
Before heading out on the road again
I am tired

And hoping so much that this show
I've put a fair bit into goes well 
But who knows

I've done my best and feel very good
About how it works. But who knows what
Others will think

10/1

Home doing last minute things
And trying to pull the house
Together a bit